Archive — family

“I just think the meanest thing a mother can do to her son is to put him in a position where he has to scold his mother, where he has to tell her to butt out or back off, and I choose to do that on my own.” - Annie Chapman

“When you first learn to dance, sometimes you spend a lot of time looking at your own feet, you step on toes unintentionally, it doesn’t look very pretty, you know, it’s kind of awkward. But when you learn to dance, at least in the literal realm of that, you get to choose your own partner. But in the mother-in-law dance, someone else chooses the partner.” - Annie Chapman

“A mother is that entity in a family that brings life, pleasure, transportation, commerce. She is an incredible asset to her family, until she overflows her banks. Until she gets out of her realm. As a child grows to maturity, she has got to back off and stay within her boundaries, regardless of how much she has invested in him, she has got to back away, and when he takes a wife, when he says, ‘I do,’ then I’m done. Does it mean I don’t love him anymore? Well, of course I love him, and my love demands me to back away because I don’t want him to have to choose.” - Annie Chapman

“When I watch my children struggle, and I watch them go through difficult times, as a mother, I keep wanting to peal the shell back and break it off and write that check and give that opinion and make that call, and yet, I realize now if I do that, I am making my children weak. As a good mother, I have to stand back and watch them free themselves from that eggshell.” - Annie Chapman

“…When I realized that my legacy, my only legacy is my children and, sure, I may be able to start some programs or ministries or whatever, but my bloodline, my love and my life are my children, and now my grandchildren. So, whatever it takes to invest in my children, it is by far the most important thing I can do, and as you mentioned…the number one investment that I can place in my children is time. Kids spell love, t-i-m-e.” - Joe White

“[In] America…we like our tea really hot right now, and we like our tea really cold right now. We either want it icy cold or just barely hot enough where it doesn’t burn your tongue. We are a country of extremes. We don’t like anything lukewarm. Unfortunately, in the area of discipline and in the area of activity, the pendulum generally swings way to the left or way to the right.” - Joe White

“I was just talking to a seventh grade kid a few minutes ago, and he was talking about how so many of his fifth grade friends now in seventh grade were starting to, as he said, ‘go south,’ and I know what he is talking about. They are starting to get into making out with girls and drinking and sneaking cigarettes, etc….and probably the underlying reason behind so many of kids’ problems is they are bored.” - Joe White

“…I met this one young lady who happened to have gone to our camp a few times and she was on track and she was as solid as they come and moral issues were not struggles for her….I sat down with her and another friend for dinner and I said, ‘How are you so solid, I mean, look at your friends around you, and they are into everything,’ and she looked me squarely in the eyes, and she said, ‘Joe, my parents fill my cup of self-esteem so full that all of my friends can’t poke enough holes in it to let the water out.’” - Joe White

“I think one of the illusions of our culture is that freedom means no boundaries when actually the greatest freedom, the freedom that comes with responsibility and a sense of self-worth and those kinds of things, actually comes from living inside of God’s boundaries, inside of His fences, and so these boundaries that can seem so restrictive are ironically the way to the best freedom and creativity and relationships.” - James Lucas

…One of the questions I ask parents [is], ‘Are your children imperfect?’ And they always raise their hands, and my response is, ‘Welcome to God’s world of parenting, that’s where God is with us. We’ve very imperfect as well. He says that we’re just dust and ultimately you can’t expect too much from dust.’” - James Lucas